I was driving down McNeil Road one evening, when I saw some road kill that didn't look right. It was small, black and had very long, coarse hair. At first, I thought it might be a skunk, but there was no white on it. Seeing that, I thought I should investigate; if it was somebody's pet, I would move it to the side of the road.
I have several towels, and I always know where they are. One was in the trunk of my car. There was no traffic, so I pulled over.
Approaching the hairy corpse with some trepidation, I nudged it gently with my foot. I mean, it was a bit small to be the Chupacabra, but you never know...
Dearly Beloved, imagine my surprise to discover that it was an Elvis wig!
I left it to its fate.