I just don't know what to say about this. I would SO like to believe you, Terrence. So many years...
I would like to begin this letter by telling you that I am sorry for the pain and grief I have caused you, your family, and the community that I once lived in.
I have never had the opportunity to speak directly to someone who knew me from my life in. Round Rock. I feel awkward because my guilt and shame are at the forefront of my mind as I write this, because I know I had a direct impact in a negative way on your life.
I deeply regret the actions of my childhood, and I’ll never fully forgive myself for my actions. I committed a violent and heinous act against Kelly, and I take full responsibility for my actions and offer no excuses or justifications for what I’ve done. My biggest regret in life is that I can’t take it back.
As I read your comments in your blog, I was forced to accept the reality that most people will always look at me and judge me for the 12 year old boy I had been and not the man I have become. I believe this will be the case because no one knows anything about the man that I have become. People see me in the media as only the child I had been, there has been a lot of growth and development over the last 20 ½ years , while I’ve grown from a boy to man in the system, and with that growth has come maturity and an understanding of the power of choice, as it relates to living a responsible and productive life. Absolutely nothing is the same about the man that I am as compared to the child that I had been.
People have the right o their opinion about me, but you made a strong comment about my wife ending up dead at my hands, and I couldn’t help but to wonder if that opinion came as a result of your thoughts of the mentality that I have now as a 33 year old educated and mature man, or if that opinion came as a result of your thoughts of the mentality I had as a 12 year old boy? Either way, you have a right to your opinion. People usually try to see the worst in me, but those who know me see the best in me.
Isaac Asimov once said that, “Violence is the last Refuge of the incompetent”, and during my years of childhood I didn’t know how to express my anger and frustration at my life and what was going on in my household. I made choices based on the irrationality of a 12 year old mentality, and I deeply regret those choices. However, I no longer make choices based on a 12 year old mentality. I think, act, and live like the enlightened man I have grown into being.
It is my prayer that this letter is received with the sincerity of my intentions. I deeply regret the harm that I’ve done to your life from an emotional standpoint. I can never take back what I’ve done, and I’m sorry for that. I can only live my life with a sense of purpose, and my purpose is to try to have a positive impact on as many people as I can in life. I’ve been blessed with the opportunity to do that in more than a couple of ways, and certain positive aspects of my life will never be seen in the media, but I wanted you to know that I put forth a effort every day of my life to try to use my experiences to bring some good out of a terrible situation.
May God bless you with peace and prosperity, Terrence Sampson