Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Quinn, the Outrageously Chickenshit

Isn't he gorgeous?

He's half blind, half deaf and somewhat agoraphobic.

For Quinn, a doorway is a challenge.

The cats are let in and out through one door, and only one. It is always the same door. Quinn approaches it with extreme caution. He sneaks up on it, peering beneath the chest in the hall and around behind the umbrella stand. Two or three steps, belly to the ground, and then his head comes up, and he...well...sticks his neck out. A few more steps, and he can see the sun (or the porch light) shining through.

Suddenly, he's close enough to rush the enemy, shooting through at top speed. He doesn't slow down until he is around the corner and under the massive Oldsmobile that lives in my driveway.

Coming in works a little differently. He hears me calling, and comes down the tree. In all the years we have lived here, he has never figured out that cats climb down trees backwards. He takes a run at it, and, when gravity takes over, he hits the path with a thud. With many glances back over his shoulder, he stalks the doorway. I turn on the hall light so that he can see the opening, and he zooms into the house in a flurry of dead leaves, sliding across the marble tile. He comes to a halt, crouching, glaring back over his shoulder to tell the door that it has once again lost the battle, and he has won.

If I had to go through that every time, I'd use the litter box.

Do they make kitty Valium?


  1. Aww. Poor Quinn. I have an agoraphobic cat. To the point that where when I have to take him to the vet he pisses all over himself and howls non-stop until he gets there. Then he gets into a low growl.

    Once he is away from other animals he seems to be ok though. When I had him shaved early summer last year (coming up again), I had to sign off on getting him anethtisized, but once they started shaving and he was away from the other animals he was fine. And he at the time had MAJOR mats.

    He doesnt like men at all, which speaks to my love life lol.

  2. Poor thing!

    Most of my cats are mildly eccentric, but Quinn is the worst.

  3. If I had not had my cat since she was an infant, I would assume that someone had mistreated her in her childhood years. She is so skiddish it is comical. She is just that afraid of everything. A towel that has been thrown down near the hamper, she will sidle around it for 30 mins to see if it is going to attack her. I sometimes think her eyesight must be bad.

  4. Oh poor kitty! and yes they do have tranquilizers for cats and dogs..