The PackRat Curse

I married into a family of packrats. They were packrats for generations. We have furniture and household goods that have been around since the War Between the States. Some examples:

26 handmade quilts
8 sets of golf clubs
The deeds to every piece of property ever owned by any member of the family
Store ledgers from the 1860's
3 slide projectors
2 pianos and a pump organ
3 telescopes
4 sets of china
14 bowling trophies
5 punch bowls
over 100 antique and vintage telephones
6 boxes of slides of fungi
4 sewing machines
27 years of National Geographics

I could go on for three more days, but I'm sure you get the idea.

A lot of the stuff is interesting. I can pore over the store ledgers for hours. And there's a silver coffeepot with a dent. The dent is the interesting part. The coffeepot was buried in a sack with the rest of the family silver during said War Between the States, and got dented by the shovel used to dig it up after things calmed down.

If I could find a stylus for one of the record players, or even the victrola, I would probably enjoy the huge collection of 78 rpm records.

Is there anyone still alive who can operate a slide rule? I've forgotten how. We have several.

The fact remains that we could live in a smaller house, if we didn't have to be the custodians of all these things.

Oh. Don't let me forget the costumes. We are involved in school and community theater, and have amassed an enormous collection of vintage clothes, and other garments that can be transformed at need into costumes. Boxes of shoes, hats, purses, shawls, aprons, overalls and petticoats. Closets full of coats, capes, evening gowns, tuxedos in varying degrees of moth-eaten-ness. Wigs. Seamed stockings. Lisle stockings. Lingerie. Girls these days do not know what a slip is for, let alone own one. Mrs Teacher (me) always comes through!

I have two huge moving-boxes full of hot rollers. Power strips and extension cords included.

The crux of the problem is this: if it wasn't needed for the last show, it probably will be, for the next.

The show must go on.