I Never Would Have Known That!

So, the couple comes in the costume shop. They are both somewhere in their 40s/50s. He is quite decisive--he wants to be a pirate. The lady is not so sure what she wants. I take the pirate (what's with all the pirates this year, anyway?) and start dressing him. Ramona convinces the lady she'd be a gorgeous pirate wench, and proceeds to prove it.

In fact, she looks lovely (wearing the corset I made for Melita in "The Oldest Profession," only reversed so the Renaissance side is out). The couple seems quite earthy, so when I see his eyebrows give that typical little wiggle, I tell her, "That means he'll be wanting you to wear it *later.*"

She says, "Oh, like the fruit salad!" He starts to make embarrassed noises. I'm giving her a WTF look. She explains:

One day, she was at his place, and he called and said something about fixing a fruit salad, as there was a lot of fruit in the fridge. She, being in love and quite imaginative, fixed a fruit salad for him that involved fruit, cheese and her sexy self as the platter.

She does have one caveat, however. She says that one should never, ever, under any circumstances, place a slice of Swiss cheese (even one cut into a heart shape) over one's hoo-ha. When warm, Swiss cheese developes a rather pungent aroma that can (and will) be absorbed by the surface on which it rests.

I am a bit beyond trying the fruit experiment, but it does bring home one of my favourite adages: you learn something every day.

If this information comes in handy to any of you, I don't want to know.

Just sayin'.