Nelly, of Nelly's Garden (link in sidebar), has been observing women her age, and has done a bit of categorizing. I feel compelled to follow suit, and describe the Texan women of A Certain Age that I see every day.
The Leathery Ladies
They tan too much. Nothing on their bodies is natural, except for the wrinkles. They are as scrawny as old lizards. Their clothes are expensive, sexy and size 4. Their jewelry is real. Their voices attest to years of too much booze and too many cigarettes. They play golf and tennis. There is never a hair out of place, and they spend as much time on their faces as they did in their youth. They are tweezed, waxed, trimmed, dyed and painted within an inch of their lives, and they think drinking diet sodas will make them live forever. They drive Cadillacs, Jaguars and Mercedes's's.
The Zoftig Ladies
They wear comfortable pant suits in soft cheerful colours. Their hairstyles are conservative and frequently dyed champagne beige. Their clothes come from Bealls, and their jewelry from Avon and Sarah Coventry. They don't wear a lot of makeup--maybe a bit of blush and lipstick, but that's it. Their shoes are comfortable. They drive Buicks or minivans.
The Hill Country Women
They wear whatever was on the top of the laundry basket. Their hair is long and tied back in a pony tail at the nape of the neck. They have never used sunscreen, and the last time they saw a lipstick it was used to write obscenities on the door of the fridge. Their pre-adolescent sons have used all their bras to launch water balloons. They bite their nails. On their feet are fetid tennies. They drive pick up trucks that look as if they climb trees for sport.
The Old Hippies
Their jewelry is handmade silver. Their clothes are of natural fiber and home made. Their diet is vegetarian, so their figures are good. Their hair and faces are natural, but clean and neat. They have very good fingernails. They have Earth Shoes on their feet, or Birkenstocks. They drive old Volvos.
Don't even get me started on the men!
I'm trying to fit into one of these categories, but I don't know which one fits.
ReplyDeleteWhen I have a family celebration to attend, I am always stuck for something to wear. There is usually a black or grey suit hanging in the closet....always a trouser suit.
My day-wear consists of denims or cords, with pressless shirts or poloneck sweaters. Geez, I'm dead boring!
My fingernails are always kept short. At this age they hurt when they get too long. Heh!
I don't use foundation or powder on my face, can't stand the feel of it. So, a little brown pencil on the eyes, plus mascara, a bit of blush and some lipstick. that's me done, for the day, I might add!
Could you choose a category for me please, Ronni
Mgt, we do not fit in any category. That's our charm.
ReplyDeleteHey, we have those women around here, too ~lhat.
ReplyDeleteI don't reckon I fit into a category, never have.
Please Ronni, please tell me about the men. Particularly the consorts of the Hill women and the Old Hippies.
ReplyDeleteOk, if you insist! It will have to be later, though, coz I'm fixin' to be late for work if I don't get a hustle on!
ReplyDelete