The Importance of Walking

From GumbieTygress

Walking can add minutes to your life.
This enables you at 85 years old
to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
home at $7000 per month.

*****

My grandpa started walking
five miles a day when he was 60..
Now he's 97 years old
and we don't know where he is.

*****

I like long walks,
especially when they are taken
by people who annoy me.

*****

The only reason I would take up walking
is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

*****

I have to walk early in the morning,
before my brain figures out what I'm doing.

*****

I joined a health club last year,
spent about 400 bucks.
Haven't lost a pound.
Apparently you have to go there.

*****

Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise,'
I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

*****

I do have flabby thighs,
but fortunately my stomach covers them.

*****

The advantage of exercising every day
is so when you die, they'll say,
'Well, she looks good doesn't she?'

*****

If you are going to try cross-country
skiing, start with a small country.

*****

I know I got a lot of exercise
the last few years......
just getting over the hill.

*****

We all get heavier as we get older,
because there's a lot more information in our
heads.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

AND

Every time I start thinking too much
about how I look,
I just find a Happy Hour
and by the time I leave,
I look just fine.